I’m a mellow boyfriend. Easygoing to the point of annoyance. I’m pretty sure I’ve niced my way out of a relationship or two. So what I do now is wait for my girlfriend to fall asleep and then whisper things to her that an asshole would say.
“Your friends suck and your cookies taste like shit.”
“Mmph. What, baby?”
“I said, I love you. Go back to sleep.”
I’m hoping she’ll wake up mad at me, but really turned on.
I’m a mellow boyfriend. Easygoing to the point of annoyance. I’m pretty sure I’ve niced my way out of a relationship or two. So what I do now is wait for my girlfriend to fall asleep and then whisper things to her that an asshole would say.
“Your friends suck and your cookies taste like shit.”
“Mmph. What, baby?”
“I said, I love you. Go back to sleep.”
I’m hoping she’ll wake up mad at me, but really turned on.
